BrownianEmotion_Anxious Anticipating of the Unknown

Doesn't it happen a lot of times in our lives that we anticipate a certain unknown situation, dreaming, practicing in our head what it would be, how we'll react to it, how will it go...etcetra...then it turns into a hysteria and total obsession, you cant think of anything else but that unknown entity...waiting for it...pausing everything else in life... just concentrating on the scheme of events related to that UFO(Unknown Future Object). The pressure mounts so much that rather than actually savouring it, we just want to get over with it... we succumb to the fear of the unknown. And creating ghosts out of nowhere we become so fidgety that we can't focus. This leads to unnecessary tension and a subsequent underperformance. Now, different people might be thinking of different situations here... but the underlying nature of all those situations is common. Now one revelation I had today is that : The UFO is unknown to us but we are equally unknown to the UFO, so that leaves an equal score and thats zero. So why dont we just do away with the crappy anticipation and cooking up of a simmering nervousness and go ahead with the situation with a clear, focussed head and a winning smile(thats just for effects :) ). Worst , things won't go as we planned but if its going good, a confident I is way better than a fidgety I. So let's dump away the futile anticipation thats just jumps on our nerves and take it easy...

Some pearls of (my)wisdom

a mind without a goal
is a body without a soul...

i may not be the best
but i am the best i can be...

To love is to care unbounded
To love is to find self again.

इंतज़ार

इंतज़ार , एक अल्पविराम...

एक ऐसी खामोशी

जो कानों में एक अदम्य शोर भर दे ,

एक ऐसा शोर जो पागलपन की ओर धकेले।

सुबह जागती हूँ , तो थकी हुई...

थकी .... इस इंतज़ार से ...

थकी , यह जानकर कि लोग

दौडे जा रहे हैं मंजिल कि ओर ....

पर मेरे पैर बंधे हुए हैं

और मैं छुडा भी नही सकती

बस करना मुझे उस क्षण का इंतज़ार

जब मुझे दौड़ना है ।

शायद यह दौड़ बहुत लम्बी है ...

और आधे रस्ते लोग थक जाएँगे...

और तब मेरा वक्त होगा ...

वो मेरी दौड़ होगी ...

तब तक...

बस इंतज़ार...

©Manashi Pathak

The Will To Win

The hours tick away...
Day turns to night
and night to day...

Burning in my soul
There is a goal...
inching towards it
one day i'll make it.

At sea, I feel...
So Lost sometimes...
But I have faith
I can brave
The gravest Tempest

I close my eyes
a sweet unrest
Inside,still resides...

The treks,
The averted shipwrecks
are glorious than the Zenith Climbed
Or the Shore arrived...

Drawing strength from every hurdle
Overcoming , overpowering
Limitations without and within
I march ahead
To claim my Win.

© Manashi Pathak

The Moon Never Looked More Beautiful

The Moon Never Looked More Beautiful
I slip into the sandy shore
As the wandering wind ushers me in
The Sun has retired for the day
And the twinkling stars adorn the stage.

I make a groove
And let the beach hug me
Million thoughts crossing my mind
And my gaze lost in the horizon

The twinkling lights of the ships from afar
Tell me that heaven and earth are still two
Which otherwise is a delusion
And endless pitch blue entity

My conscious being takes a back seat
I hear the words being spoken
My subconscious takes control
And I listen to the restless eyes

How I long his presence
The Moon looks creamier
In these moments of wait
How I wish we feel each other, the togetherness
The glistening trail left
On the dancing waves
Celebrates the beauty of darkness & shimmer
Of solitude and union

It’s late and I look around
Just once for the last time
With the hope and fear
And I find him near…yet far

Heart racing, I blush…
But as I near him, I mask…
One look I yearned…
And I see in him the shimmering reflection of my sheen…

© Manashi Pathak

Does God believe in himself?

Majority of the humanity worship a Power considered more powerful than any known thing or phenomenon. It is popularly known as God. Believers have the faith "Whatever happens, happens for good", "He knows best" , "He has something written for everyone"(Hugest scriptwritter with a lot under His belt and many more to come!!?). These phrases dipped in the syrup of faith are spelt with the sole aim to euphemise some terrible, unwanted, devastating, earth shattering event. If we take for a surety that such a Power exists, if He has schemes for every living being then how do we(He?) explain a sudden unnatural loss... a loss to good people...who never deserved such pain and agony. He is believed to be the ultimate Justice... the Leveller... then how do we explain all the injustice?...Did He doze off then? Or was He just too busy with the new scripting or something that He didnt notice the heating milk spilling over the stove?! and when He, the infalliable, does err(whereas right to err lies with the mortals), whom does He turn to, whom does He answer or does He just flip the page and move on like an obnoxious brat? Too many questions here and i don't even know whom am I asking...but going by the script he has woven for me and my near and dear ones, i am bound to question His own belief in His deeds, in Himself.

My Humble Attempts at Haikus

Ma waved me goodbye
A fake smile consoling her
Silently i cried
***********************
Dont come near me
Understanding, a longshot
I rather be alone
***********************
Dreams make me strive high
Roadblocks try to pull me back
But i grow stronger
***********************
Its bright and chirpy
One harrowing night it was
A new Dawn today

©Manashi Pathak